"Sir. Either buy a 40, take a shit, or get out."
"Thanks for coming into the Himalaya office on such short notice."
"Jenkins! Stop playing with your balls and put some pants on!"

Marty, a soon-to-be contributor and coworker, got one of those New Yorker Magazine cartoon-a-day calendars from his mom for Christmas last year. As a child I remember the New Yorker cartoons as the slightly amusing oasis in an otherwise entertainment free doctor's office waiting room. Becoming reacquainted with them, I have come to realize that at least the cartoon's in Marty's calendar, are the most pretensions pieces of totally unfunny sh#t ever created........ So! Marty and I decided to spice them up a bit with our own captions. Later on, another coworker and soon-to-be contributor Evan, also joined in.

Without further ado, I present you with vol. 1 of the on going series: "Defacing Eustace Tilley." You can mouse over the image to see the original caption (I highly recommend that you don't).
"Honey, we love you. That's why we want to talk to you about your addiction to the Container Store."